The term yoga comes from a Sanskrit word which means yoke or union. It is a form of exercise aiming to align your physical, mental, and spiritual self, and beyond–aiming to align you with nature, other people, God, your true self and all the world around you. (Amazing that this practice can do all that, right?!) There are hundreds of yoga poses (asanas) and breathing exercises (pranayama) that are thousands of years old that are practiced today. So a hot yoga class takes some of those poses and turns up the heat–literally! There are different types of hot yoga classes. Bikram Yoga is done in a room heated to 105˚ and it is the same class every time, consisting of 26 postures and two breathing exercises. Other hot yoga classes will vary each time and may not be as strict. Some may be completely different, like Vinyasa Flow. This is what my certification was. It is a series of continuous movements/asana linked together and synchronized with the breath.
I like to say that practicing hot yoga is practicing traditional yoga, as these postures were originally practiced in India long before there was air conditioning! The hot yoga room is heated to very quickly warm your body and muscles, making them pliable, ready for deep stretching and keeping them safe from injury. The Hatha Yoga poses and breathing exercises themselves are deeply beneficial. They are already designed to work every system of the body–cardiovascular, nervous, lymphatic, endocrine, immune, digestive, reproductive and skeletal. They work to flush away all waste products and toxins of all the glands and organs of these systems through the circulatory and respiratory system. Then, the intense sweat you build in a hot yoga class continues that detoxification by flushing them out through the skin. As if this weren’t enough, you will gain strength, flexibility, endurance, concentration, and focus from practice. Your heart and lung capacity will improve, your body will be reshaped through weight loss and muscle tone, your stress level will be lowered and you’ll sleep better, and last but not leas,t your complexion will improve because of all the detoxing from sweating. At my studio, we say it’s like getting a facial in every class!

Other free (and kinda weird sounding) benefits you’ll receive in class…a natural salt water nasal rinse and a lack of B.O. if you come regularly! I swear, once you sweat out the initial toxins, if you have a healthy diet, you will no longer have body odor! My personal favorite things I love about hot yoga, everyone’s faces are red, so if you are a blusher (like me), it’s comforting because no one can tell you’re blushing. Same things with sweat and tears–no one can tell you’re crying when you’re working out all your life issues because of the extreme sweat! And most of all, everyone is in it together. There is a camaraderie in a hot yoga class, it’s comforting to know that we will all come out looking the same in the end–like we stepped out of a pool–and it doesn’t matter how we looked coming in, and we made it though so much challenge in the middle.

So if you’ve never been before, now’s the time. Be brave, leave your ego outside the studio, don some fitted shorts or capris and shirt, and step into a hot yoga class today.
Namaste’ (The light in me, recognizes the light in you, and under God we’re all equal),

Countrygalcitygal

PS. Don’t forget your water.

Holland LeDelia is yoga and Pilates instructor in Jonesboro, Ar and NYC. Find her on Facebook, follow her on Twitter @hollandledeliat, & visit her new website hollandledelia.com (launching in June). When in Arkansas, she teaches at Nirvana Hot Yoga Studio in Jonesboro and Paragould. Check out their info & schedule at www.nirvana–studio.com.

1. Be outside & enjoy the world around you. There is much to be said for getting back to nature. It is very healing to put your feet in the grass and look up at the infinite sky above you. To see the symbolism as you practice Tree while being surround by trees

Tree amongst the trees

and to contemplate how nature and animals around you have influenced the asanas you are practicing will make you see poses in a new light.

2. Practicing outdoors will take your practice to the next level. It is very challenging! Your balance will be tested as you stand on uneven ground and you must learn to set your focus without having a mirror in front of you. You may feel the wind testing your stability or surprising sounds around you forcing you to stay focused on the present moment and the pose at hand. Which leads me to the next one:

3. Improve your focus and mindfulness. All of these little things that you encounter outdoors will get you out of the same routine of your indoor or group class practice. Every time you encounter something new and different it brings you back to the present moment and gives you the opportunity to question what it is you are feeling. This allows you to live completely in the now, where you can devote yourself to everything that is happening in your body and in the immediate world around you. This is the place where peace lives…far from your “to-do” lists.

4. Take advantage of free Vitamin D. Get your dose the natural way! Sunshine will give you a natural boost helping to fight off those winter blues you may have been experiencing. (Be sure after 10-15 minutes of direct sunlight exposure, you add your sunscreen or cover up!)

5. Outside is great place to help you meditate and cultivate gratitude. After your asana practice, you are all warmed up and ready to sit in meditation. Continuing to allow your mind to quiet, this is the perfect place to remind us that we have everything we need. The fresh oxygen we are breathing into lungs, the sun for warmth, the flowers, fruit and vegetables we eat to live. And even more so, how everything works together so perfectly, (the circle of life), the trees taking in the carbon dioxide that we exhale, the sun that creates photosynthesis in the plants and trees and make them grown, the scraps of food we don’t eat that decay and nourish the soil to make it good for growing. All these things you can contemplate and I hope it brings you much peace.

–CountryGalCityGal

We can live our lives like this by approaching things with a beginner’s mind. I hear this term a lot in yoga and meditation. It means seeing all things new. This is a wonderful mindful practice that will bring a sense of wonderment to your life and a deep overwhelming sense of gratitude. Give it a try today! As you walk outside admire the warm sun on your skin, the cool air you breath, people’s laughter around you. Then try it with the seemingly mundane things and see your world be transformed! When you can give thanks for the warm sudsy water as you wash your dishes, remembering the delicious meal you just ate, thankful to have the food to feed your body and plates on which to eat it, you will find great joy. If you are still rolling your eyes as you read this, that’s okay! Take it one step at a time, and appreciate with great wonder something you love in your life. And if you need to remember what awe feel like, watch this video from Science Friday.

Where’s the Octopus?

Holy Moly, right?! I watched that entire video with my jaw dropped open. Language fails us when it comes to describing things like this. There is only so many times I can say remarkable & unbelievable!

One of the things I love the most about this is what marine biologist Roger Hanlon says at the end. “We’re behind…if we think the world looks like the way we see it.” Wow. How true. It is such a gift to be reminded of how little we truly see. Our vision is so very limited, our knowledge, and our perception as well. We must learn to look beyond.

It reminds me of the saying that ‘we are not humans beings on a spiritual journey, but rather spiritual beings on a human journey.’ What would change in your day to day life if you approached it from that standpoint? Not only would we live surrounded by awe and joy, but we would have much more compassion for our fellow beings. We could begin to feel the comfort of the interconnectedness of everyone and everything around us. How do we begin to practice this? Through mediation. When we meditate, we begin to lift the veils that ‘cover’ our true spiritual selves, made by society, and history and our own false perceptions and limited vision.  This is how we learn to go inside, find and connect with our true selves,  the part of us that is from our source and the part of us that is the same as in everyone else (like the term Namaste’).

Last night, my teacher, Rudrani from World Yoga Center, said “to say that meditation is relaxing, or relieves stress, is too small. Meditation is a REVOLUTIONARY practice!” It’s so important! When you first begin to meditate,  you may glimpse that space, that part of yourself. You may begin to feel, energy, or shakti, like a shiver or a warmth, and, hopefully,  you feel a comfort in that place. If you are not there yet, don’t worry, but don’t stop practicing. You do not want meditation to feel like a chore, something you get to check off your ‘to-do’ list. My teachers have said don’t do it if that is what it feels like. But take time to keep coming back to that comforting space inside.

Deepen your breath, still your body and ask for guidance from God, the universe, or any guru or sage or saint, to find that place. When you meditate, you are being assisted and guided by many spiritual teachers, ancient and living, and they will care for you. Remember to notice what you see and feel during your sessions. Everything is valid and important. It’s okay to feel nothing but relaxed, but you may see the face of teacher or experience a vivid memory, or feel hotness or coldness or laugh bubbling up. That is all wonderful and means that you are letting the energy flow and connecting to your true self. So if you struggle with ‘liking’ meditation, start with a few of these suggestions–you simply want to enjoy the feeling so much, that you want to go back there time and time again. You even want to live there.

What a gift that is inside us all, waiting to be uncovered. Take a few minutes in meditation today and then open your spiritual eyes in wonder.

Om Shanti

CityGal

This past week a small groups of friends and I began the journey of reading the book A Course In Miracles. This will most likely take over a year! This is a book of Christian origin that was divinely dictated to a professor in the 1970’s. (It is controversial to many close minded individuals). To me, it’s like an addendum to the Bible where a more philosophical Jesus takes some time to clarify or update some messages. They say the book finds you at the right time and when I stumbled upon it a Barnes N Noble on Christmas Eve, I knew that it was my time. So here goes…

Reactions to our first reading–which was the first three sections of Chapter 1: Principles of Miracles.

Something of significance I’d like to say to begin, is that I read less than 1/2 of the first page and then wrote all this before continuing my reading. I sat on a plane and filled the front and back of a piece of paper simply by what the first 1/2 page inspired in me. I was amazed to find sections, as I continued to read, that supported exactly some of the things I had written, and I then went back and added statements from the text. It was/is an amazing feeling.

(So here I go, for real this time…)

Why have I lived my entire life–until now–thinking miracle are few and far between? And very difficult to attain?

1st thought: We unconsciously prevent miracles from happening because we fear them becoming to common and therefore less meaningful.

2nd thought: We like to believe we are not capable of making miracles happen ourselves and we feel we must rely on a higher, holier deity to grant them to us and ONLY if we are worthy.

3rd thought: The ego doesn’t want to believe in miracles because to believe, it must surrender. Surrender of control and surrender to the easiness of it all, surrender to the likeliness of miracles, and surrender to the selflessness required to allow miracles to happen.

YET: ACIM says “Miracles occur naturally as expressions of love.” (1.1.3) & “When they do not occur, something has gone wrong.” (1.1.6)

If we truly understand how special a miracle is, it will never become commonplace–even if we experience 10 miracles a day! When you stop to think about everything that had to take place for us to be here right now, from every system working in our bodies, to the evolution of technology to be on a computer, to the way our society and world functions as it does in general, IT IS ALL AN AMAZING (somewhat overwhelming) MIRACLE! Perhaps that is what actually happens when we become mindful and begin to live in the present moment–we awaken to the miracle of every moment and every situation.

I am so moved as I write this and make these realization for myself, for the first time!

The talk of mindfulness and being present, brings me to 1.1.7 “ Miracles are everyone’s right, but purification is necessary first.” Purification of the mind is reached one step at a time by becoming mindful and by living in the now. 1.1.37 “A miracle is a correction introduced into false thinking…perception is healed…until this has occurred, knowledge of the Divine Order is not possible.” So much of the suffering we go through in life is simply because of our limited perception/perspective! Once we admit that we cannot see the whole picture, we will be liberated from judging situations as bad or good. We can have faith that all is as it should be, and that although we may feel temporary pain, we are on our best/proper/perfect path. 1.1.38 “He separates the true from the false by his ability to perceive totally rather then selectively.” 1.3 “You cannot behave appropriately unless you perceive correctly. Miracles arise from a mind that is ready for them.” Miracle Readiness!

Another key is truly understanding that everyone is equal. I believe you cannot freely experience the wealth of miracles until this is truly engrained in you. We are all cut from the same cloth! Namaste’! 1.1.40 “The miracle acknowledges everyone as your brother and mine. It is a way of perceiving the universal mark of God,” and 1.3 “When you bring in the stranger, he becomes your brother.”

I have an exercise I’d like to suggest here. I have been doing this lately as I strive to break down all barriers between me and my fellow man. When you walk into any room, take a moment to look at all the people around you. Declare to yourself that you are all equal. Begin to notice what comes up. Does your ego try and fight this notion? Notice that different places illicit different responses from yourself. A room full of friends or  people all there for a common reason may be much easier for the ego to accept. Or maybe you feel a a deep camaraderie amongst a group, and you begin to feel a euphoria as you realize how not alone you are! This exercise will help us to treat all people with respect, break down our egos and to let go of many of the physical barriers that we let stand between us.

Lastly, a quick personal note of a struggle that came up for me.

I am looking for the balance of how to live in this modern society and world as the spiritual being that I am. This includes many issues but the one I am asking myself today actually comes down to language. I have been known to cringe when people use the words like miracles and blessed. “The Lord has just blessed us and it is a miracle–PRAISE be!” I have just rolled my eyes on the inside, but I don’t wanna do that! I believe the we are infinitely blessed and I recognize the miracle of sitting right here this moment and I love God, so why do these kinds of statements turn me off so much? Perhaps it rings false with me? Perhaps it seems fake coming from people who always have so much (ie rich westerners)? Perhaps it’s the English language itself that seems not to do feeling justice? Either way, it adds up to a lot of judgement on my part. I can imagine that, non-judgement, would be my first step to letting this go.

Perhaps its the fact that we not raised to learn the art of conversation as spiritual beings, you know? This is not what I learned in cotillion! The art of good conversation includes current events, literature, art, music, leisure but not your heartfelt, personal relationship with God and your fellow man. In fact most people waste a lot of conversation bitching about their fellow man and cursing God for the pain they feel in life. Perhaps this is more the issue…how to shift our conversation. (This also would explain my total shyness & extreme blushing I experience when attempting to discuss reactions in meditation groups and Satsang in NYC).

Also, although I am working to reduce the amounts of labels I use in my life, (about myself, others, and the world around me), I must still be afraid of labels people would put on me. I don’t fit many molds these days. It feels like unless I fit into society’s perfect mold of a religious leader, my deep spirituality will be dismissed, and I will be known only as new-age, hippie, & granola. I will be judged by some for being deeply in love with nature and animals, someone who doesn’t earn a traditional living, or contribute enough to society with endless consuming, or someone who lives with parents or extended family. Ultimately, others judgements won’t matter and I will strive to show how good all those attributes can be.

Anyone have any reactions?

Namaste’

CityGal

“A Course in Miracles”
over the course of the next year (more on this later, I’m sure), a second meditation group has sprung up in our little town–other than the one I co-lead (which is Mindful Meditation Mondays on FB) and I have enjoyed exploring the chakras there each week, I started reading the fantastic book

“Into the Wild” and am utterly fascinated by it, I got to lead another wonderful yoga retreat, I am surrounded by amazing family, friends and clients, and my cat started sleeping under my arm like a stuffed animal. I mean, come on, life is GOOD!
Make sure you stop to take a minute to count your blessings, small and big, and then jump back into the present moment and feel them first hand!

Now, let’s get down to business. I am lucky that in NY I am great friends with a couple who loves healthy, organic cooking, and are interested in making more things from scratch. Together, we tried our hand at (another) fermented food, sauerkraut! If you love the taste of sauerkraut, then you’re going to love this because it is OH SO VERY EASY to make. (If you’re not a huge fan, I still urge you to give this a try and make a mild version because it is so good for you).

My Sauerkraut

Quick Overview

The following info is from my new book “Real Food Fermentation” by Alex Lewin and the website www.naturalnews.com.

Sauerkraut has been around for several thousand years and was created as a means of preserving food for the winter. It is super healthy for us because it provides us with all the benefits of cruciferous veggies (cabbage, brussels sprouts, cauliflower) like high levels of vitamins A and C, phytonutrient antioxidants, anti-inflammatory properties, and the ability to lower cholesterol levels and fight cancer! Now when you ferment, or pickle, the cabbage, you get the probiotic advantages and turn it into a superfood! (Probiotic basically means beneficial live bacteria that are essential for many vital bodily functions like digestion). To get the most benefits from sauerkraut, you need to make it yourself or get it freshly made.

How To

Get some jars with lids (reused from your kitchen or canning jars)

A good knife

Large cutting board

Large mixing bowl

(optional food processor)

2 tsp of sea salt per pound of cabbage

some heads of green and red (purple) cabbage (about 1 2lb head per quart jar)

Chop cabbage. Sprinkle salt. Massage for 10 minutes. Squish firmly into jars, making sure that liquid covers the cabbage and leave an inch of space at the top. Place in cool, dark place. Open every few days, sample if you desire, and then pack it pack down. You will begin to see the bubbling and the color change as it ferments. Eat as early as 1 week later and keep going as long as you like. It will get more sour the longer it ferments. When you are ready to eat or stop fermentation, place in the refrigerator. For more benefits, do not heat beyond 115 degrees F.

Watch step by step HERE!

Lessons from last week, for this week:

Count your blessings and enjoy it all

Have private dance parties

Make super healthy and easy sauerkraut

and one other thing I learned this week—it’s Brussels Sprouts not Brussel Sprouts. Who knew?

Mucho love & Namaste’

CountryGal

As I have been working on mindfulness and living in the now over the past few years, I have come SO far in getting my thoughts under control, in the sense of not dwelling in the past. I used to be a terrible dweller! As Kyle (the BFF) pointed out several years ago, I can’t even throw away magazines, so of course I have a hard time letting go of past relationships. Now, I don’t allow myself to have magazine subscriptions, and I am learning to let the past be the past. But even though I do not sit around mourning old relationships and decisions, when it comes to love there is something that binds us to one another. And that something is very tangible and does not go away when the label of a relationship dissolves. Not if there was true love present.

So that’s why I cried. And that’s why my heart hurt. I mourned a great love that we shared together for a little over a year, when I was 16 and 17 years old, in a small town in Arkansas. The most amazing first love I could have wished for. A love with high school dances and theater, and notes passed in the hall. My first french kiss, and celebrating our anniversary every month, and tooling around town in his convertible. And visiting him at Ole Miss for a year while he was a freshman. And then, I had to move on and go to college. And I could see two roads: one to Ole Miss and staying in a relationship with him forever, and one to somewhere else where I would be on my own, testing out the world. I knew option one was romantic, but not realistic. At some point down the line, whether it was 5 years or 25 years later, I would need to set out on my own.

We very thankfully remained friends, talking on the phone a lot for the first few years and seeing each other occasionally. Then his family moved away from Arkansas and now it’s been about three years since we last talked. Of course, social media exists now, so we can very easily see what the other is up to. And he’s up to getting married…and sky diving, etc.

While I’m on this subject, I want to talk a minute about marriage and “successful relationships.” I have started to change my thinking over the years, to truly enjoying the day to day moments of my relationships and not judging them. How many of you have broken up with someone and said, “I can’t believe I wasted x number of years of my life on him/her!” I may have thought that way a long time ago but not anymore. If there were days full of love that you shared together, then how could that ever be a waste? I believe living in the moment is sometimes challenging when dealing with relationships but only because there is such a strong need to put a label on them in order to nail down the future. Labels and rules and pieces of paper only give us a false sense of security. If you remove those ultimate relationships goals like marriage, or staying together forever, as long as your time was happy together, it was successful! You shared love for 6 months, or 10 years or 40 years, etc.

I realize that wanting to have kids in a timely fashion may be a reason to feel a time was wasted in a relationship. Or perhaps if there was serious wrong doing going down. But otherwise, I feel we should start valuing the time we spend with a person and not judging it a failure when it ends–whether it ends in a break up or a move on or a divorce. In the movie Cocktail, Tom Cruise’s character says, “Everything ends bad or else it wouldn’t end.” Not only is that incorrect grammar, I don’t think it has to be true. And this concept will be a hard one for you to grasp if you have never experienced a “good” breakup. (Even a “good” breakup is full of heartache, but maybe you come off with some sort of friendship and well wishes for the other person.)

Everyone dreams of a fairytale ending with their chosen mate, but it just doesn’t exist. And I’m not being cynical! (I’m not necessarily anti-marriage.) In fact, the opposite! I am living a fairytale amazing life every day right now! I could not BE more blessed, so I am not in the market for something/someone else to give that to me. And the fact is that we are constantly changing and growing–now, always, forever–changing. We have to have the happiness and the completeness in ourselves because we outgrow people and people outgrow us. Our jobs change, our careers evolve. We move, people move, people die, people start families and it all changes. Yes, we may be able to change with our chosen mate, but should we cling so tightly? I’m not saying it’s easy, but I think it may be true.

There is a quote (that I could not find now that I needed it) that says “Many your heart be broken many times, because it will mean you loved many times.” Well, I’ve felt the love and I’ve felt the heartbreak and it’s blissful and it’s agonizing and it’s wonderful and it makes you feel alive. And I can feel a little pang in my  heart when I wish my first love a lifetime of happiness and adventures with his wife, and despite the pang I am so grateful for the love we shared all those years ago.

Peace and Love,

CityGal

Savasana

So I’m 30. I guess it’s no big secret, but I feel like such a scandalous southern woman admitting this so freely. Mary Kay Ash, founder of Mary Kay cosmetics (whom I very much respect) once said, “I never tell my age. Why should I? I believe that a woman who will tell her age, will tell anything.” So I used to live by this and many other southern charm school traditions in an attempt, I guess, to connect to my roots–to have things with which to align myself–but now I’m starting to think why? All the attempts we make to add to our identity are actually just stoking our egos, and that’s not necessary or productive. I have been striving to slowly strip away these labels! And furthermore, what is really the problem with “telling anything”? I am writing this blog after all, and feel that I am pretty much an open book. (Also we all live now in this age of social media where we share much more than ever before with more people than ever before.) How are we ever going to start real communication and evolve, and help each other until we start talking? For example, recently (now that everyone is talking about the Lilly Ledbetter Fair Pay Act) the I listened to a segment on NPR salaries. In most companies it is actually against policy to reveal your salary to other co-workers, but there some companies out there that put all that info right out in the open. Yes, it may be an adjustment as co-workers learn how to work well together knowing the salary that they each earn, but there can be many benefits, such as truly making what you are worth and seeing that you are not discriminated against for any reason, and also holding each other accountable to fulfill your duties and earn the salary that everyone knows you earn. This is just an example of how things could evolve and get better when we starting talking!

Which brings me back to aging (more of this in a blog to come). Why can’t we all chat about the aging process so we can start to accept it? It is no big secret that we are all aging and that our bodies are going to change as it happens. Why don’t we all talk about things like dying hair to cover gray instead of everyone just pretending that gray hair no longer exists? It’s weird, right? I digress. Back to my two week Birthday Extravaganza! Readers are always asking for more about NY adventures etc, so here we go.

I decided to celebrate with Arkansas friends first and then celebrate my actual birthday in NYC. A lovely group of ladies and I ended up across the river in Memphis, TN on a Friday night doing yoga on top of The Peabody Hotel followed by dinner and drinks at restaurant called The Majestic Grille on Main Street, near Beale. We noticed–as we got in the PORSCHE my Pilates client let me drive (have I mentioned that I have the best clients in the world?) –that although many others had good intentions of joining us for the evening, it was only the ones without kids that ended up going. Just an interesting observation that we all laughed about.

Porsche Mission Control

Flowing

I found out last minute about Lululemon’s free rooftop yoga class and decided it was not to be missed! We enjoyed the amazing view atop the iconic hotel and flowed through asanas as the sun was setting. There was a DJ and a little bit of trace dancing before we ended in a long savasana as darkness fell. There were over a hundred yogis there and it such an amazing feeling to share a practice with them all as we turned the Peabody rooftop into our sacred place.

My Birthday’s of the past several years have consisted of low key get togethers with friends over food, maybe some games, but for whatever reason, this year I wanted to go out! I was ready to dress up and hit the town and wine and dine and dance. So after the amazing yoga session, we transformed ourselves in the bathroom and headed to dinner. I didn’t overdo it–just one delicious cocktail, and my favorite salad–a Waldorf. I so enjoyed the company of the classy smart ladies who accompanied me. We drove into great conversation ranging from yoga, to gay rights, to school and science and cooking and many other things in between. It was such a relief to talk because sometimes. Especially with the state of politics right now and being in Arkansas and in my line of work, I find myself not fully able to throw all my opinions out there and have any healthy heated debates! Then a free desert smorgasbord happened fulfilling my dream of Tiramisu and providing a shot glass of desert for everyone! Then we walked around downtown and hopped back in the dreamy Porsche to head home. Thus beginning my late night escapades.

A few days later, it was time to pack up and head back to the big apple. It was a welcomed sight, complete with great friends and perfect summer turning into fall weather. And it was time for more celebrating. Let me preface this portion with, I don’t really drink and stay out until three in the morning anymore, but I guess it was time to start! After an audition for Maggie in Cat on a Hot Tin Roof (which I am born to play by the by), I spontaneously spent all day with my best friend, who had already insisted that he be with me when the clock strikes midnight on my birthday. (Despite the fact that I was actually born at 1:36 PM). He walked me to my present which was having a street artist, who sits most days outside of MoMA paint my portrait. It was incredible. Who has sat for a portrait these days? I was there for an hour as he painted layer upon layer of color onto a 9 x 9″ square of paper. Kyle wanted me to have painting, capturing the last day of my twenties. (I actually have a pencil portrait of me when I was 16, so it seems that I do this every 15 years or so!) His portraits all had an air of morose about them, so I tried to look up and give the slightest smile but it still came out as it did–honest, beautiful, tragic. Next time you’re in the city I highly recommend visiting MoMa and the artist Mark R. Nilsson at his portable studio on the street. You’ll walk away capturing a moment in time, owning a lovely piece of art, and supporting a true artist.

Portrait by Mark R. Nilsson

After the painting I run errands all over the city while Kyle stars in Wicked on Broadway. Then we meet up for late night dinner and drinks. Kyle enjoyed telling everyone–friend or stranger–that it was my 30th birthday, which resulted in way to many free drinks. I don’t know how I survived three different locations where I consumed a martini, a margarita, a tequila shot, a beer and a Yeager bomb. I mean, this is not college or something and I am so not a drinker and am generally super healthy. I can’t believe I survived the night but I did, and Kyle was with me as the clock struck midnight…and for the following three hours.

Then it was my official “going out in NY for my birthday” night. Birthdays in NY are generally so expensive and most of my friends are on very tight budgets, so it’s always a toss up as to who will end up going out with you and there is no hard feelings for those who can’t make it. I ended up with a table full of wonderful friends, dining at Spring Street Natural. The restaurant was in NoLita in Soho–so that’s south of Houston and North of Little Italy, if you are confused. For dinner I had seitan with asparagus and lentils and a delicious and freshly squeezed blood orange cosmopolitan. YUM!

Dinner

I have to brag now, that I found a cute dress in Springfield, MO during the summer that caught my eye and imagined myself wearing it for my birthday in NY, but I didn’t allow myself to buy it. Then over the following weeks, I was able to put together my own version of it with things I already had a home. Check it out:

My mom hemmed a plain strapless white tube dress I had a home and I paired it with this crazy black ruffly shoulder wrap I NEVER get to wear. I added gold bracelet and black lace platform heels and I was all set. Not bad for not spending ANY money, right?

So then we were off to do some dancing. I bought a Time Out New York magazine in an attempt to figure out what club would be cool on a Wednesday night. I settled on The Delancy which was within walking distance of the restaurant. I called ahead so when we got there, we all got to sit in a fancy velvet booth in front of the stage. So I went there because I felt like dancing and I did not want to go to a pretentious straight club in midtown with a $20 cover and wait in a line outside the door forever. And dance we did. We had a blast as they played music from every decade. Dancing with a bunch of Musical Theater people is just the best. So in between the bouts of dancing, there was a…burlesque show. Hysterical that this is what was happening for my birthday! We laughed and were thoroughly entertained both by very talented performance and very dreadful ones. Every time boobs came out, I’d turn to my friend (half of them gay) and say “you’re welcome!” It was crazy and perfect.

I got home at 3am for the second night in a row. It took me a week to fully recover. But, hey, you only turn 3o once, right? At least in this lifetime. Now I’m left to ponder this crazy thing called life and how it’s possible I’ve been on this earth for three decades. All I can say is that, somehow, things are exactly as they should be and these three decades have been the wildest, most amazing adventure I could ever have imagined. I am infinitely blessed and wouldn’t change a thing. What about you?

Mucho love

citygal

Ahhh summer. The time of endless fresh vegetables and farmers markets. This is the perfect time to take advantage of fresh local delicious tomatoes! The Heirloom varieties are my favorite. Always jump at the chance to get some Cherokee Purples, Yellow Valencias, Brandy Wine, German Stripe, Ananas Noire, Early Girls, or Arkansas Travelers. As a special treat I will quickly tell you the recipe for a delicious Heirloom Tomato Pie that I make quite often in the summer.

Holland’s Heirloom Tomato Pie

(Special thanks to Kyle Dean Massey for sharing this recipe with me years ago. It has now be modified to make it healthier!)

Being with a hearty wheat pie crust. To make an easy one yourself cut a 1/4 of a stick of cold smart balance butter (salted or unsalted and add 1/2 tsp salt) into 1 cup of whole wheat flour mixing in ice water until it clumps together–between 3-5 Tablespoons. Then grease a pie pan with a little olive oil and push the crust in to cover the bottom and sides.

Would you like to be a pie?

Cut 3-5 heirloom tomatoes (different colors/varieties) and try to get some of the juice out. You can do this by layering them on a colander and sprinkling with salt–letting the seeds and juice drain out for at least 10min. (Be sure to drink that juice!)  Next alternate layering tomato slices, Gruyere cheese and fresh herbs such as rosemary, thyme and basil into your pie crust. Salt and pepper to taste. Stack it up high and bake at 350˚ for about 1 hour. ENJOY!

Before…

Done and Delicious!

Now let’s get to the canning. If you are new to canning, you may be asking yourself, why should I do this? Some of you may not even think you like tomatoes anymore, and if you only eat the average grocery store variety all year long (including winter), then I don’t blame you! I can hardly eat tomatoes from the grocery store anymore and especially not in the winter time. They have been so genetically modified to all be exactly red and symmetrical (appealing to the eye) but unfortunately tasteless. Not to mention probably shipped in from another country and/or pumped full of chemicals. I steer clear of them. Soooooo, preserving the delicious heirloom or homegrown local variety to enjoy throughout the winter is one great reason to try some canning for yourself. (Remember, you might also try dehydrating as a canning alternative.)

Heirloom Tomatoes from Farmer’s Market

 Begin with a bunch of tomatoes. You can can any amount–large or small–just keep in mind it takes about 6-7 medium sized tomatoes per quart (about 2 3/4 lbs). Perhaps mixing your favorite varieties or making jars with all the same kinds together. Choose the freshest tomatoes as possible and make sure there are no bad/rotting places on them.

Boil a large pot of water–just a large pot, not your giant canning pot. Now, you are going to “dip” your tomatoes to make the skins easily slide right off! So, put 4-6 tomatoes in the boiling water and let them bob there for a minute or two.

Quick Boil

Cold Water Bath

Peeling

Then, dip them out and put them in a tub or sink of cold water (iced if needed). Next use a paring knife to peel the easily peel the skins from the tomatoes. Core them while you are at it, removing any green spots and set the tomatoes into a pot (getting ready to cook in a little while) and get the jars ready. Depending on how many tomatoes you have, get several quart jars prepped. Wide mouth jars are the easiest if you are canning whole tomatoes but small mouth will work as well. Fill your giant canning pot with water and begin heating it on the stove on high heat getting it boiling. Examine your jars, looking for crack or chips and discard any that aren’t perfect as they will not work. Wash the jars with hot, soapy water or run them through the dishwasher. Once the water is boiling, carefully set your jars in the rack and lower them into the pot for sterilizing. (The rack is great because it keeps the jars from touching, which at that high temperature, keeps them from touching and breaking). It’s time to be serious now! Make sure your hands stay clean and you are no longer handling the jars around the opening or on the inside. Fill a sauce pan with some water and heat to boiling on another burner. Then place canning lids (NEW) and rings (can be reused) in here for sanitizing.

Now, let’s cook the tomatoes! Place the pot of them on a burner and bring to a boil, stirring and cooking for five minutes. Carefully remove clean hot jars using a jar lifter (look like giant tongs for grabbing jars), and set them next to the stove on a towel. Use a wide mouth funnel to ladle the hot tomatoes into the jars, filling towards the top, but not past where the ring will be (1/2in). Use a wooden spoon or plastic spatula inside the jar to squeeze out some of the juice of the tomatoes and then add more tomatoes to the jar. Then add 1 tsp canning salt to every quart jar and run a knife or other kitchen utensil between the tomatoes and the jar to remove any air bubbles. (If you would like to make tomato juice, then run the cooked tomatoes through your food processor and then place in jars.)

Removing the Air Bubbles

Use a clean damp dish cloth to wipe the tops of the jars. Use tongs to get out canning lids and place them rubber (sealing) side down on your jars. Then use the tongs to grab rings and screw them on! Now place your jars one at a time into the rack in the canning pot using the jar lifter and balancing them as you place them in. (For example don’t place them in clockwise, but rather 12:00 then 6:00, 3:00 then 9:00.) The water should be hot and not boiling and, after you lower the rack down, should cover the jar by 1-2 inches. (Add more water if necessary). Place the lid on and bring water to a boil.

Processing

Then process (cook) quarts 45 minutes (Pints–35 minutes). Carefully remove one jar at a time and place on a thick bathroom towel. Once all jars are out, cover with another thick bathroom towel so that there are no drafts. Cool and leave in place for 12 hours. (Listen for the pop sound of the seal working! During this time do not tighten rings.) Remove the rings and clean the outside of the jars, checking for the seal. Add a label or write on the top to identify what you have made and the year you made it. Store in a cool, dark place like a pantry and enjoy over the next several years.

Namaste’

Countrygal

My animal rescue skills are mad crazy. Now it’s true that I have not actually removed an innocent fox from a trap or braced a bird’s broken wing or adopted a family of baby racoons who lost their mother or anything, but for me, I have had quite a busy week of rescuing insects, amphibians and reptiles from certain death! Last week on Monday I was out midday doing some light weeding of my garden, pep talking the plants, playing with my animals, and enjoying the few bees I was seeing. You know the bee population of North America is really suffering because of many possible causes such as mites and exposure to pesticides. Without bees around to pollinate our food, I personally believe the human race will be in serious trouble. So instead of worrying about this and praying that other people will do something about it, I have decided to raise some bees myself in the not so distant future. Apparently the average hive costs about $300 and can literally live in your backyard (even in suburban areas!) So I smiled as I watch a bee going from blossom to blossom around my squash and pumpkin patch…then it buzzed right into a spider web!!! Eeek! I have been trying to not interfere in these types of situations even though I do feel for the prey, however, I figured I needed to help the bee because they’re really struggling so I used a stick to set him free and he buzzed off on his merry way.

Day 2 in the garden. Tuesday. I pulling weeds out from around green onions and black radishes when I see a little movement out of the corner of my eye. I look into the pipe that is still in the concrete where my basketball goal used to be a see a frog (toad) floating on the surface of the water from the recent rain. Oh no–I am immediately transported back in time to childhood at my Grandmother and Grandad house where I accidentally killed an animal. My cousin, Ambre’, and I filled up five gallon buckets with water and put some frogs in so that we could watch them swim around. It was all very innocent. We did not know that frogs (toads) could not continuously swim and would actually drown. We saw it happen in one bucket and ran around the house to quickly turn the other one over, but it was too late. Both frogs perished and I felt extreme sadness and remorse. You may think this is silly as I know many kids melt slugs and tie mice to bottle rockets and stuff, but I was not that kind of kid. I love all things deeply and even as a child understood the value of life in all beings. So when I saw this frog, legs spread wide, attempting to bob on the surface of the water for as long as possible, I though, “Aww crap,” and I gently poked him with a stick, expecting the worst. But he moved slightly. Then I though, “Aww crap,” again, because I’m going to have to save him. This may mean touching him, which I have actually never done. (I somehow even did not touch the frogs I caught that one time when I was little). At first I started carefully dropping rocks in the hole trying to raise him up to the surface, but then I realized this could take forever and action was needed now! So after psyching myself up a bit and making a few attempts, I reaching in there and gently, but quickly scooped him out. Then I got to watch him. I LOVE watching God’s amazing creatures. I saw him blink his eyes and could see his sides expanding with breath and his tiny heart beating. He sat there for quite awhile before attempting movement and I checked back in on his progress for a half hour or so before he was gone. He had trouble going, though. I have no idea how long he had floated there with his arms and legs open. When he was sitting, his little legs were still spread wide and looked really awkward. I imagine it would be like if we held the splits for a half an hour or so and then tried to walk…recovery time will be needed.

And now 2 days later, Thursday. Welcome to my garden, Plainbelly Water Snake.

Sneaky Snake!

This fellow was hung all in this deer netting I have around my small garden. I did not realize this until after he was still there for a few hours. It was amazing to get to study him up close. He was SO cool. His (or her, I guess) skin look rough, like a tire with round eyes and a completely yellow belly. After studying him, I went in to the computer to educate myself about Arkansas snakes and decide which one I believed him to be. There are only six poisonous snake varieties and this guy was not one of them. I deduce it’s a Plainbelly Water Snake instead of a rat snake.

Yellow Belly

I finally realize he’s stuck when I water my garden and he starts wiggling all around. Then I feel really bad and I’m thinking, “I can’t just let him die there!” I call around and get advice from people. “These snakes aren’t any different than snakes that people keep as pets in tanks, so just get down there, pin his head down and cut him loose.” Umm…I want him to be free, but I just touched a frog for the first time two days ago, so, baby steps. Then my dad, the same superdad of my childhood saves the day again. He MacGyvered a razor blade to a piece of pvc pipe with duck tape, put on some gloves and went to work in operation Snake Freedom. After about a solid 10-15 minutes of careful work, there is success and my dad gently prods him towards the woods. (The cats “help” as well).

Friday, my Animal Rescue efforts are completely exhausted and yet there is something buzzing around stuck in the deer netting yet again. This time, a giant dragonfly, size of child’s toy helicopter, literally stuck and buzzing to beat the band. After summoning all my strength and courage (laugh at me if you will), I take scissors and snip two thread until he soars free. *sigh* My work is done here.

The fact that I love animals is apparent. Eckhart Tolle says, “When you are in touch with the inner dimension within yourself–and being in touch with it is your natural state, not some miraculous achievement–all your actions and relationships will reflect the oneness with all life that you sense deep within. This is love.”

I am feeling that oneness with all life, that all life is special. That all things are living according to their life’s purpose. That all things want to live. Why do I have more right to life than they do? Is it because I have opposable thumbs? Is it just because I am a human being? The answer is that I don’t, but that in order for me to live, sacrifices must sometimes be made. This is what I’m dealing with when it comes to ridding my garden of pests and the future things I will deal with, like protecting my chickens from predators. As cheesy as it sounds, we are all a part of the circle of life and even if I eat vegetarian, beings are dying everyday just so that I can continue to live, (until it is my turn to die). Everything we eat has been sacrificed so that our lives can go on. It is better for me to take the burden on myself of killing the bugs in my garden or theoretically killing the animals I would eat, than to only continue to blindly consume. The fact is that if I’m not doing it, then someone else is out there doing the dirty work. I can give them thanks and assure them that I too will be a part of this circle of life.

Have you thanked your food today?

Countrygal

Baby Lucky
Photo by Nick Coleman colemanphotographix.com

Well, I am simply heartbroken.  I feel like I’m in middle of bad dream as over the past few weeks, two of the three of our dogs and one of our cats were killed by what we assume was a pack of wild dogs roaming through the night. (We live in the country.) Don’t get me wrong, I’ve been around a lot of death…especially the last couple of years when I lost five close relatives from the Holland family (my namesake), but very little untimely death. My family and I have always been animal people and have always kept dogs and cats. (As well as the occasional duck, hermit crab and turtle. I’m also planning for the future chickens, pigs etc.) We’ve lost pets along the way but never like this. I am feeling so much–literally going through all those stages of grief and death. I feel so guilty that they died protecting us, as we were cuddled up in our comfy beds safe and sound. They had no where to go and be safe. Although even if they had, it was not in their nature to turn and run away. They literally fought and died for us. They are truly the most loyal, faithful, selfless animals. Fulfilling their duty to the very end. I pray they feel our thankfulness. But it seems such a waste of precious lives. Now I will attempt to end discussion of their death and celebrate their wonderful, meaningful lives and discuss what all animals, especially dogs have to teach about enlightenment.

Dogs truly are our guardians. Eckhart Tolle calls them our Guardians of Being in his book by the same name. They are animals that are so very smart and intuitive, they are called man’s best friend. A friendship with a dog is so much simpler than a human one! You don’t have to worry about talking and not talking or saying the “wrong thing.” They live in the present moment with you always and constantly show you how joyful that is.

Be alert as you watch a dog at play or at rest. Let the animal teach you to feel at home in the Now, to celebrate life by being completely present. The dog is still in the natural state. And you can easily see that, because you have problems and your dog doesn’t. And while your happy moments may be rare, your dog celebrates life continuously. –Eckhart Tolle

Throughout my whole life, a dog has been a constant. Therefore it is a comfort. I loved having a litter of puppies when I was little. Raising them for awhile and picking out one or two to keep before giving the others away. I had one dog, Ginger, from fifth grade through junior year of college–about 12 years–putting her up into her nineties in dog years! She lived a long, full life, beginning to get arthritis in the end. She moved very slowly and even though we had just adopted Lucky, I made sure to give special time for brushing and love to Ginger whenever I was home. On her final night with us she laid out in the yard near the house too tired to move as it began to rain. I watched from our second story window as my dad went out and picked up her 60lbs. body and slid it into a plastic dog house nearby. She died peacefully, head on her paws, looking out at the gentle rain and  to the house which held her beloved family.

Ginger

So as I said, we knew Ginger was getting along in years, her brother Spike has passed on years before dying of heart worms. (Let me interject here, that we live in the country–outside city limits. Although things have changed now, a lot of people used to just have dogs. They lived outside and were fed table scraps and allowed to run free. They really only saw the vet to get fixed or if they were in dire need. This is pretty much how I grew up and it really wasn’t a bad thing. They were not neglected, they just weren’t treated like members of the family like most dogs are now! Now, our dogs still live outside and are allowed to roam free on our property, but they visit the vet and wear collars and eat dog food. I feel guilty though, because we long ago should have made proper fencing around our house and some of the property. It could have kept our animals safe and I am sad that is it only a priority after this event.) A few years prior to her death, my parents inherited Casey, the Great Pyrenees. She came to live with them after becoming too smart for her own good at her current farm home of one my dad’s employees. She learned how to escape from the electric fence and begin to tell all her sheep friends how to do it as well! She was about three years old when they got her and she lived in the backyard in the dog pen where all our dogs start out, (until she got brave enough to simply jump the fence.) She was very aloof. All I wanted to do was hug that big white fur ball and she would have none of it. It took me years to get her to come to me while I squatted down, held out a treat, and turned my head away. She would quickly take it and then run off, of course. We had never had a dog like that, but we loved her just the same, and she loved us too… just from a little ways away. She had a special relationship with my dad, who could give her a pat on the head. And if you ever walked the property, she would go with you–a few yard behin.

Casey and my Dad

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It was Casey and Ginger for awhile and then I was introduced to Lucky. She was the runt of a litter of golden lab mutt puppies that were born in my Uncle’s backyard in rural Arkansas. The mother had already decided she wasn’t going to be able to care for all the pups so she left Lucky behind. My Uncle rescued her, put her in a box with a towel and bought some puppy formula and a dropper. She was sleeping there at my Granny’s house when we walked in for Thanksgiving dinner. I sat with her and loved and petted and pep talked and fed for hours until she finally stood up on wobbly legs, walked a few steps , and pooped on the floor. It was a miracle! I loved that little dog! Now that she had turned the corner, my Uncle took her to his classroom where he was teaching school at the time, where I’m sure she received much love from students. At Christmas time, we adopted her (thank you Uncle Berlan) and one of her sisters, Angel. When the two of the were  side by side you could see how Lucky’s growth had been stunted, as she was much smaller than her sister. (The pic at the top was over Christmas vacation when Lucky came to live at our house, in the dog pen until she was trained. My BF Kyle is with us. That day we walked the whole property–18 acres–with Lucky and Angel at our heels having the time of their life exploring, and Casey with us, in the distance.) We only had Angel a year. We think she ate something poisonous, because she had passed away by the time my dad came home to take her to the vet.

3 Dogs and a Cat!

I believe this post may turn into a memoir at some point–it seems every story leads to another one. As my dad carried Angel away in a wheelbarrow to bury her in the woods, Lucky looked for her all over the pen and tried to follow her scent. My dad dug a hole which uncovered a hornets nest–of which he is very allergic–causing him to run home and dive like he was an young action hero under the garage door. Again–my memoir will have to follow all these loose ends! Having the puppies around gave Ginger a new lease on life and she lived another year with us. When Lucky was old enough to have puppies of her own, on July 4th 2005, she did. I was visiting from New York, but we were off at a family reunion when it happened. When we got back it was thunder storming and I saw that she had had her liter under our camper near the house. She was scared and confused and I spoke to her from the garage door because of the lightening. Then, she started bringing them to me, one by one, I quickly piled them onto towels in the garage, then dove headfirst under camper, right into mud, to save the little ones from drowning in a puddle. She had at least seven or eight–all black with a little white, Brooklyn who is colored like a Beagle and one dark brown one who was the only casualty. She was so protective we were barely allowed to touch them and I was heart broken when it was time for me to head back to NYC. (Definite CON. I do not enjoy leaving my animals in AR.) My parents kept Brooklyn and Phantom, who was black with half a white face.

Over the years, I saw my babies every time I was home. Lucky played ball with me. Brooklyn got run over–twice–once breaking a leg and making her live in the garage for three months as she recovered. She came through both of those like champ, (although she definitely cashed in a few of her extra lives). She is the sweetest dog ever, doing anything for you as long as you love on her. Casey eventually developed bone cancer, as apparently many dogs of her size do around eight years old. My parents chose to amputate her front right leg and she lived a few more happy months before disappearing into the woods to die on her own.

Phantom

Phantom was the strangest dog we ever had. He acted like a rescue dog that had been beaten by his former owners…except he lived his entire life with us and we had never raised a hand to him! He needed a lot of extra love and attention. He would never come when you called and was really dominated by the other two females in his life. So I started making sure I always went to pet him first and give him the first treat combined with lots of love and belly rubs. Finally, over the past few years, he started to be outwardly happy. Tail raised high in the air, coming at least half way when you called and rolling and rolling in the grass and the sunshine.

As I have had to deal with all this loss, I have felt so many emotions, which has made writing this post very difficult. Even as I was about to finish it, our cat, Shogun, some how opened the cat door during the night and was killed. And then all those feelings started over again. It’s been a roller coaster ride and although I am finally beginning to feel some peace, I still feel the loss and it hurts my heart. I do my best to imagine them just on the other side–just out of their physical form or perhaps sitting at my Grandparents feet. I send them my love, my energy, my eternal gratitude. For animals teach us what the love of God is like–complete and unconditional. They bring us closer to God and to our higher selves.

Namaste’

CountryGal

Note: All my animals came to me as they passed on and woke me up as I slept. The night that Lucky and Phantom died, I dreamed I heard them running and running and then they collapsed right outside my window and I immediately woke up. The night Shogun died I woke up suddenly, getting very hot and forcing myself to get out of bed and look out the window. I couldn’t see him there because the sun was coming up, but I know he was telling me goodbye as well. Goodbye to my Guardians.

Shogun

And to conclude: A tribute to Shogun, my littlest cat. Not quite a year old, who was too smart for his own good, only had one eye, loved the free toy from the Friskies bag, had fur that was as soft as a rabbit’s, and brought much joy to me and my family.

Recommended reading for dog/animal lovers: A Dog’s Purpose by Cameron, The Art of Racing in the Rain by Stein, Getting Lucky by Marino, Guardians of Being by Tolle.